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[04 Apr 2005|06:12pm]
John invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but noticing how beautiful John's room-mate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his room-mate, and this had only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and his room-mate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you Julie and I are just room-mates."

About a week later, Julie came to John saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure."

So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying that you 'did' take the gravy ladle from my house, I'm not saying that you 'did not' take the gravy ladle but the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."

Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read:

"Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Julie, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Julie. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom."

Lesson of the day ...Never Lie to Your Mother
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[13 Feb 2005|01:20pm]
What does your t-shirt say? by rejektedrockstar
Name
Age
Fav. Color
Gender
Ta-Da
Quiz created with MemeGen!
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Been a while! [27 Jan 2005|05:19pm]
[ mood | excited ]

Hey guys! Haven't left anything in here for you to read in a long while. Not that anyone reads this anyways. But I got some awesome/major news. I got a new ride!!! No more little white cavalier for me. I made the first purchase of my adult life. Last saturday I went and got a new truck. Well a 2003 but almost new. I got a Chevy Avalanche...hence my new background and such. Oh man, it's fuckin sweet. It doesn't have very many miles on it, and it's all power everything. I got it all on my own, without a co-sign or anything. If you're around here, you've all got to come see it and go for a ride. All I need now is a cowboy hat, and a huge ass belt buckle...LoL
Short entry, but it twas a major event I thought I'd share with you all.

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[05 Jan 2005|10:20pm]
Napoleon
Napoleon Dyanamite


Which Napoleon Dynamite character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
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LoL if you know me, you know why this is hilarious [08 Dec 2004|09:17pm]
Would anyone want to bang you? by phobia
Name:
Favorite Food:
Wants to Bang you:
This many times:66
Quiz created with MemeGen!
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[15 Nov 2004|10:48pm]
I'm driving
looking towards the future
nothing behind me now
I'm not looking back
like the changing of a scene
fade to black
Without the darkness of the night
you would never appreciate the beauty of the sunrise
Time both stands still
and effortlessly flies
it's a glimpse of heaven
when I look into your eyes
Things come
and they go
I will love you
and be by your side always
that you undoubtedly know.
In life there are many choices
but there is only one you
all can try
but only you will do
I love you
wholeheartedly
effortlessly
with all that I am
from now until then
I'm forever your man.
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It flies by [13 Oct 2004|07:21pm]
[ mood | loved ]

Wow, where has the time went. Seems like only yesterday her and I met. And now here it is 2 months later. In some ways it feels like it has been so much longer, and in some ways it feels like it was just a short time ago. I have never felt so close to anyone as I do to her. She knows how I am, almost everything about me. My family really likes her, and my nephews love her. And from what I know and think her parents really like me. My friends are all wanting to meet her. It's amazing. You all know how I have been hurt before, I once thought I should have just given up after the last time, but I am so lucky that I didn't, so lucky that you all kept pushing me along. I have found the woman I will spend the rest of my life with. It's weird knowing the things we do know, but I love it. Sometimes I'm at a loss for words, imagine that, me at a loss for words. Brandi I love you, you are everything I have ever wanted/looked for and more. I look forward to every day that I get to spend with you. The times we laugh and the times we cry, all together, side by side. Making it through everything because we do have each other. I am so happy that I'm not really afraid of anything anymore. There is always that slight fear that I will lose her. But I know I won't. I don't have to think about it, cause I know it won't happen. Her and I have so many days together ahead of us. I dreamed of this all my life. Now I'm living it. Dreams do come true, they have since the day I found you.

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[08 Oct 2004|09:36pm]
You want me,
my kiss on your skin,
to feel my body against yours,
fingertips running from the outside in.
My breath on your neck,
my lips on your chest,
hands all over your body,
I won't ignore the rest.
Your breathing grows harder,
I'll take you there and back,
you scream my name,
together we're always on the right track.
I love you,
and every sound you make,
so passionate and sexy,
with every breath you take.
Your body calls to me,
waiting for my touch,
I give it all to you,
you deserve it so much.
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I might have a lot to say [04 Oct 2004|01:34pm]
[ mood | anxious ]

It's almost time for some grand events...I'm quite anxious and nervous for them both. The first being the new job. I am so ready to start it. I look forward to working full time making some good money. The Y was good to me, but I had always known it was shady. I'm gonna miss some of my kids there, but not the people for the most part. I put in my two weeks on last wednesday...so that means I'm supposed to be done working there on the 13th of this month. Well I think I'm gonna cut it to friday. Because to me it seems stupid to stop in the middle of a week, plus Brandi's fall break is this weekend and goes till tuesday, so I will get to spend some quality time with her. Have the rest of the week off to get various things done. Then I'll be ready to start my new career at Bell Tech. Logix as warehouse specialist/delivery person. It should be a good job for me, I get to drive a big van around the state basically. Get to be out on my own a lot and be productive. Perfect fit for me. Once everything with that gets started I'm going to look even further into online classes, so I can get my associates degree in either Criminal Justice or Law Enforcement. One that is done, well it doesn't have to be done, I will enroll in the police academy and complete that. And I will have achieved a goal of mine. Leaving others that will come in time. Ie... marriage, kids. Basically the ultimate goal of a family. I have the woman for the job. The title and the kids will come in time.
So that brings me to the next bit. Sunday I finally get to meet Brandi's parents. I'm very excited about it, but quite nervous as well. I really hope her mom likes me. I know it won't change anything between Brandi and I if she doesn't. But I truly hope she does. Because I do love her daughter, and will be everything for her that she needs. Sometimes I feel I'm not good enough for some people. I know I'm good enough for Brandi, because her and I are/were meant to be together. I just hope her mom sees it. Bring on the questions, I'll answer them. I will always do everything I have to make sure she has what she needs in her life. God has given me one of his angels. I will always keep her.
And here is the last topic for now. I know I love Brandi more than anything. More than I have ever loved anyone. The other day I got a catalog in the mail from Helzberg Diamonds, so I got to thinking. And Brandi has been looking at rings. So yeah one thing leads to another. My system is this...promise ring...engagement ring...then wedding ring. I can't skip to one step without completing the other. So I have begun looking for promise rings. I am 100% sure that I have found the one I am getting her. I thought I was going to give it to her for Christmas, had everything in my head how I was going to do it, but she asked me to not get her any jewelry for Christmas. So on to my favorite holiday, Valentine's Day. For Brandi, prior to me, Valentines Day had been a day she loathed. But I will change all that. It's my day, the time I like to shine more than usual. I will give her the ring, along with the promise that we have already promised each other. To be together forever, to get married, to have kids, to be a family. I know where I'm going to do it as well. Chicago here we come. I know where I'm giving it to her at as well(top of the Sears Tower if possible). It'll be perfect, it couldn't not be, because everything to do with her and I is. So yeah, that's what's in my head.
So yeah Erika you mind having company that weekend before Valentines Day?

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[30 Sep 2004|11:43pm]
The website I had back in the day, well I've revamped it a little bit and have started to add some of the newer material to it. So go check it out, tell me what you think on here, leave me comments on there in the guestbook. I'll eventually add all of my poems to it. For all to see. Here's the address...http://www.expage.com/thenotsosecretlair
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Quite possibly, no it was, the best weekend of my life [26 Sep 2004|09:44pm]
[ mood | giddy ]

I can try to some up this weekend in words. But all that keeps coming to my head are one word answers. Wow. Amazing. Greatful. Loved. Destined. Plus many others. If only you all were so privilaged as to have a weekend as I just had. This weekend more than ever showed me that I do infact have the woman I will spend the rest of my life with. I could cry because of how happy I am.
I can't wait to spend my days with her. Wake up beside her, go to sleep beside her, spend my time with her. I want to put down everything, but I don't think I could describe it good enough. Plus some things are meant for my mind to keep. Everything about this weekend was truly beautiful and amazing, but none more than Brandi. I miss you so much already. I'll give more of my thoughts once I have let them all sink in completely. The best weekend of my life so far, but with you there are many more to come.

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[24 Sep 2004|11:55am]
gambit
You are Gambit!

You are a fierce fighter and a good friend to have.
Your preference for solitude and your
attractiveness make you very intriguing to
those you meet. Unfortunately, close
relationships are few and far between for you
because you often have trouble opening up to
others.


Which X-Men character are you most like?
brought to you by Quizilla
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[20 Sep 2004|12:10pm]

Which John Cusack Are You?
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Just as the last was completed, another came into my head [19 Sep 2004|11:56pm]
I can promise you anything
and make it come true
because I've got that kind of luck
I wished for my angel
and I was given you
All I need until the end of time
is you as the woman in my life
the truest thing I've ever known
you keep me going
you'll be my wife
Can you imagine it
the happiness we will see
I've never seen it before
now I will always see it
it's what you give me
So I will give you it back
more of the same
I look to the day we get married
it will truly be the best
you will then receive my name
We are together even now as one
but then it will reach a new height
with our feet both planted on the ground
we will start our life together
fate has always been right.
We never questioned it
and we were right not to
it has never been wrong
after all look at us,
you've got me, I've got you.
Time will not stand still
we move along with it
our love will always grow
because my life was missing a piece of the puzzle
you are the only true perfect fit.
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[19 Sep 2004|10:42pm]
Walk Forever By Your Side


Walking with you,
your hand in mine,
there isn't any place I'd rather be,
at any other time.
Unless we can skip to the future,
so I can see you standing there,
looking beautiful as always,
with not a single care.
It would finally be here,
we would be where we've always seen,
standing there together,
just as in our dreams.
Nothing is more perfect,
than what we have together,
I'd do anything to prove everything to you,
isn't one test I wouldn't go through.
Us we will always be,
even now everything is clear to see,
if anyone was meant for someone,
it'd be me meant for you,
no one else could ever love you like I do.
They could try
but it'd not come close,
no one could ever be we,
except you and I.
I mean together forever,
we both know we'll live so happily,
it's not happily ever after though.
It's happily from now until the end,
we're only at the start of this book,
we're the authors no need to look.
It's still being written,
all of my everything you'll be gettin'.
We will fill in the pages as we go along,
the binding for this epic is so strong,
but it won't have an end,
because stories end.
What we have will never,
we will have each other,
from now,
until forever.

I love you, for all you say and all you do.
We have all we could ever want, but there is more to come.
I love you eternally
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[17 Sep 2004|11:36am]
So when I thought it was a low point, things started to pick up. They always have a way of doing that. I knew it would all turn around. And it has. Brandi and I are wonderful. Like you wouldn't believe. Next weekend we're going to a B&B and staying for the night. Then back to her apartment so I can stay with her again before Monday gets here. Wow staying in a B&B something I've never done, but it feels nice to experience it with her. We will have a lot of these experiences. Because she is different from everyone else. If you could only meet her, you'd see. But that's not the only thing that looks good. I recently got asked to apply for a job as a warehouse specialist, where I would be working full-time making 12 to 14 dollars an hour. I did a whole new resume for it, so maybe I'll get it. Also at the Y they are talking about making me a site director for the school I'm at. Which would be cool, I've moved up the ranks fairly quickly. But I know I deserve it. Even with a new position I still wouldn't be making that much an hour. And it's definitely not full-time. So if I get the other job I'd go in a minute. On another note Brandi has basically convinced me to go back to school, so I'm gonna apply to IUPUI and get an associates degree in Criminal Justice. Plus a lot of you don't know that I plan on getting into the Police Academy here soon. So that along with the degree in Criminal Justice, I'll become a Police Officer and make fairly good money. I am also seriously considering trying to get into the FBI. But I don't know all about that. Serious events are in the making. It should be great.
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[13 Sep 2004|06:56pm]
[ mood | horny ]

I was reading a friend of mines myspace post, it was something from Cosmo. Sex tips from guys or something like that, well I agree with them. Here they are.

- Brush your breasts against my back while you give me a massage, as your nipples get hard, I will too
- Slide your panties off and hop on top of me with your skirt still on
- Scratch the back of my head when I’m giving you oral sex
- When we have sex from behind, lie on your stomach, tilt your hips up slightly, and move them in circles until we’re synchronized
- Suck my index finger like you’re simulating oral sex. I swear there’s a direct path between those nerve endings and the ones in my penis
- Push me down on the bed and start going at my body like it’s an all-you-can-eat-buffet
- Let’s wrestle
- Walk around the house in boy shorts that let your cheeks hang out
- Let your lips linger along the front of my hip bone before working your way down south
- Kiss the front of my neck up to my chin. You’re so close to my mouth that I’ll be dying to taste you
- Give me a few minutes and then ask if I’m up for a rematch. I’ll be up
- Run your tongue up and down my spine, from my neck to my tailbone
- In the shower, soap yourself up, then use your body to wash mine
- Three words: edible massage oil
- Don’t be self-conscious when I want to go down on you, I like it
- Blow on my nipples
- I like spooning, it allows me to kiss your neck, touch your breasts, and run my hands all along your thighs
- Show me how you want me to go down on you by kissing the skin between my thumb and index finger
- Dig your nails into my back to get me to thrust harder
- When you’re on top, pin my arms down right before I climax, and ride me hard… all the way to the finish line
- Squeeze and release your pelvic muscles when I’m inside you like we’re playing a game of tug-of-war

Not that anyone reads this I'd be doing these things with, but hey it's good information

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[11 Sep 2004|01:03pm]
Sadness still lingers, seems to be getting worse. I haven't seen her in 2 weeks, and won't get to see her for another. I believe I might be falling into a slight depression. I did a couple things last weekend with some friends. Which was a nice change from the norm. But since it's been back to nothing. I truly hate this feeling. Where do I belong, why do I get like this? I know in some ways I allow it to happen. But it's not completely me. I want some true friends, I want to see my girlfriend more often, I want to actually live life. Rather than watch it and everyone in it pass me by. Things always seem to go great for me, then abruptly change for the worse. Doesn't seem to be much of a happy medium. I need someone to save me, or at least help me. Because for once I don't know if I will be able to do it on my own.
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[03 Sep 2004|10:57pm]
I've wrote a lot lately of my love life. But there is more to me than just that. I work quite a bit, and actually wouldn't mind working more. I say that because I honestly don't feel I have any friends outside of my girlfriend. She is one of my best friends so that's great, but I would like to have other people around my age that I can just hang out with when I have nothing to do...which seems to be all too often. It honestly saddens me quite a bit to say that I don't have any friends. You'd think a guy like myself would have a ton of friends, but I don't. I have some, but out of them only a few are close friends. I don't really have anyone I can go to, if Brandi isn't around, when things aren't going well. So I hold everything inside, until I eventually burst. Like right now I'm going through a tough time, problems with my knee, in which I might actually have to get surgery done. I'm not afraid, but it'd be nice to have someone around here. For someone who seems to have it all, I'm missing a major part, the social aspect. Having friends might help me feel centered and actually have a place. Because I am realizing more and more every day that I don't have a true place I belong. I can fit in with almost anyone, but I don't know where I belong. In my life I feel lost a lot of times. Not about love, not about work, but about who I really am. I know I'm a great guy. But where do I really belong. I know who I belong with for the first time in my life, that's one thing I'm sure of. It could be said I have a lot in my life, but everything means nothing if you don't have people around you, whom you care about, and whom care about you. I have my family, and Brandi. Not a whole lot of other people. Things have to change, and I know I have to start that change, but it's hard for me, when all I do is work basically. I don't go out, cause I don't have anyone to go out with. When I go to see her, it's about her, so I don't meet people there, which that would kind of be pointless anyways, since the whole point is to find people around here. In the darkness that is life, she is my guiding light. Helping me on my way when I think it's over. If she were here it'd be easier, but she isn't. Which is a blessing in disguise. Because it will make all the time I spend with her mean that much more, and prove how much we do love each other. But there are differences, she has friends up there with her. Even here, where I was bord and raised, I have basically no one. You know you're not alone, but that's how it feels. Like no matter where you turn, you won't see anyone you know. I really miss her, but I really miss having friends. I always seem to be able to find a new girlfriend when I don't have one, but once I lost my friends, I haven't been able to find new ones. It could be thought that if I would have went somewhere else for school, then I'd have met a lot of people. But then it could be looked at inversely as well. If I went to a school that was away, then I'd never met the girls I did, never met the woman I want to marry, Brandi. And I wouldn't have learned what I have. I no longer need to search for a girlfriend, cause I have found that and so much more. Now I need to find the friends to place around me, the ones who can keep me on track when she isn't around, keep me on track when she is around.
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[17 Aug 2004|12:24am]
When the sun doesn't shine,
on a dark day,
You are the one light,
that brightens my way.
You should know by now,
I live and die for the love of you,
If you were ever sad,
to make you happy there isn't a thing I wouldn't do.
I fell into a trap,
I don't want to break free,
falling in love with you,
was the only place for me.
The passion I saw,
when I looked into your eyes,
You told me you love me,
there isn't a better prize.
I could win many things,
but nothing as valuable as the words you said,
I hear them all the time,
they resonate in my head.
Don't stop loving me,
I'll never stop loving you,
like what we've talked about,
we know there isn't anything we can't get through.
Thank you for the gift,
I'll return it every day,
Anything to make you happy,
if I don't know it, I'll find a way.
Two people,
Two lives,
Together as one love,
Always
and
Forever
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